Summer Recap

Today marks the last day of my internship working in investment services. I feel like a real grown up. It kind of stinks sometimes...So many sunny summer days spent in an office wearing business casual (who came up with that term anyway?) answering client calls while my friends sent me pictures of their summer adventures abroad or lazy days by the pool. There were definitely moments I was awfully bitter about this growing up thing, about this responsibility thing. It isn't always glamorous. But in the end I'm so grateful for the opportunity that I had and the ways it allowed me to grow and learn. 

The amount I learned about insurance, wise investments, and finances in general is crazy for only being here for 12 short weeks. I gained some great practical life and career knowledge that I'll need as I graduate and begin a real career not too long from now, so I guess I can't complain too much about that. I definitely feel way ahead of the curve now. That in itself is a blessing. So check "learning what an annuity is" off my bucket list. Ha, yeah right that wasn't on there. But if it was, I could check it off now. ;) 

Additionally, I learned a lot about myself- about what type of work I like and don't like, about how to work with a variety of different types of people with different life stories, of different ages, and more. These are the three little ladies I spent the most time in the same office with all summer: 

I'll never forget these three. These gals were a blessing to work with for more reasons than one. I can confidently say I learned something important from each one of them and I couldn't have asked for a better group to spend my days with. 

Cupcake dates to Yummy Cupcakes and Starbucks coffee runs happened more often than probably necessary, and I'm totally okay with that :) 

(Sometimes blurry) Seflies were taken, joy was experienced. 

I've heard some internship horror stories from some of my peers, so I can say I more than lucked out with such a great group and experience. I developed great connections with my coworkers and I was also blessed enough to develop a great friendship with one of these coworkers in particular. 

(Like I said, selfies were taken, joy was experienced.) 

Paula is of the sweetest ladies I've ever met. I never expected to have such a great relationship with a "boss", but I'm sure glad that I did. It made for a great experience and made my days so enjoyable. She taught me a lot about loving people even when it's no fun, always putting other people's feelings before her own and showing warm friendliness to all who crossed her path even on long days or days she felt discouraged and stressed. Her cheerful smile, peppy attitude, and genuinity are too rare in many people in corporate America these days. She displays what Christlike love and patience truly is in her  daily actions without even realizing it. I really admired that in her and I truly believe God set her in my life as an example of how to be more gentle, more patient, and more generous as a young woman. 

Throughout my time as an intern, I feel like I really began to understand more about what I value in people and in work through a lot of time spent in the office as well as through a lot of reflection and prayer throughout the weeks away from school. 

Throughout the last few months, God revealed a lot to me about myself, my true desires, my strengths/weaknesses, and where my heart is. It kind of hit me like a brick. I think it's been a long time coming and a work in progress for awhile, but this summer really allowed me to reflect on it, spend more time in The Word, and learn the true meaning of discipline through working full time, meeting deadlines, presenting myself professionally, and more. 

At the start of the summer I prayed that the Lord would stretch my understanding of what He expects from me as well as prepare my heart for the upcoming year in Bloomington to better live as His disciple. It's always been in my heart, but I really found myself longing to know how to do this better and this summer that desire has grown immensely. By the grace of God, my understanding of what needs to be done in order to do that has increased immensely as well. I know for certain He stretched my understanding this summer, both in and out of the office, revealing to me things I need to either seek out and get involved in to better my relationship with Him and respond to the desire in my heart to further His kingdom. He also clearly revealed some things that need to be cut out (socially, personally, even fashionably as silly as it sounds, etc.) if I truly and fully want to claim the life of following Him. The following quote has beyond proved itself to be true over the past few months. 

I asked God to break me down, teach me and show me His way, and lead me wherever and to whatever He calls me to no matter the cost. More than ever, I have fully embraced that I need to sacrifice certain things that don't always encourage me in my walk with Him and things that may inhibit my ability to witness to Him, while at the same time pursue things that will strengthen my walk with Him and my ability to truly live the life I want to live, even if it's uncomfortable. And boy, it can be uncomfortable. But I realized that if in prayer I'm going to dare to utter the words, "Spirit, lead me where my trust is without borders, let me walk upon the waters, wherever you would call me. Take me deeper than my feet could ever wander", and mean it, then I have to deal with and embrace the discomfort that will come with that. It's not meant to be easy. He has called me higher and deeper because I asked him to. He sure does answer prayer. 

I need prayers that I will continue to respond to that call as the school year begins because as I've already experienced, when we do, the rewards of peace and grace far exceed the small price to pay of sacrificing certain things the world promises are okay or will bring happiness, when in reality they don't. He stretches us and when we say okay, letting go of all things holding us back, the result is incredible.  

I feel like in so many ways the experience of working in this environment along with a lot of reflection time of the past year and discernment of messages He has been writing upon my heart, I've developed a whole new viewpoint on life and what's important to me (regardless of what the world says), as well as how to better prepare myself to be who He calls us as His children to be. I pray that all the people in my life experience this as well. It comes with an incredible amount of joy and peace that I just want to pour out to all around me. I feel like a whole new person in so many ways, while still being the same old me. Or like a new part of me has been discovered or uncovered and He is polishing it off to shine and really become a part of me. It's so crazy how much God can transform different areas of our lives, of our minds, and of our hearts at different times. 

I'll never totally get it right and I'm constantly growing, which is how it should be. But I'm really starting to see Him work and by trying to be 100% unashamedly open to that work, I am slowly seeing more and more tiny glimpses of His goodness and beginning to hear and answer call that I've never seen this way before. 

He wanted me to grow up this summer, in more ways than one. Professionally, socially, mentally, and spiritually. Now, I truly believe that this is why He provided this internship opportunity to begin with. It's not even in my field of study, I just kind of stumbled upon it and it fell into place. He knew where I belonged and where I would grow the most. Looking back I can say that without a doubt that has happened. 

So the bottom line is that I guess a few weeks of giving up beach days and sleeping in were beyond worth it, in more ways than one. But now I'm going to spend the next few days before going back to school by the pool, at the beach, oversleeping, and consuming more ice cream than necessary ;) 

He is so good!